Never Apologize for Your Tears

Perhaps the best advice I ever received in regards to grief is to never apologize for your tears. Own them. If you are sad, and need to cry, do it. Anyone who may seem uncomfortable by your emotions can simply turn their head. There is absolutely no shame or weakness in crying.  More often than not, your body needs you to cry, as it releases a whole bunch of  chemicals and hormones that were making you feel blue, and creates ones that make you feel better. Win-win.

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Rough Weekend

I don’t know why, but this was a rough weekend for me, filled with lots of tears. There were so many things that reminded me of Jen, or caught me off guard, and made me really, really sad.

Shall we recap?

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My Dreams

I feel that I have been very open and share a lot of my personal experiences here on Coniffdence. I share my good days (and my bad) and try not to hold anything back. I don’t censor myself in an effort to protect anyone, and I own my feelings, whether you find them right, wrong or indifferent.

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11 Months | 100th Post

No matter how much I beg or plead, the 17th of every months still rolls around. Today, although I’m sure I don’t need to remind you, marks the 11th month Anniversary of Jennifer’s passing. (Wow-even typing it out seems surreal.) As I sit here quietly thinking of what to say, I can feel the weight just pushing down on my shoulders, and it becoming increasingly more difficult to take a deep breath.

(Pause for coffee sips and to collect my thoughts)

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Lost Dreams

For me, one of the most difficult parts of grief is dealing with lost dreams. There are no words to describe the pain and hurt of loosing Niff, but sometimes I get so caught up in missing things that didn’t even happen yet.

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“Are You F#!&ing Kidding Me?!”

I know.

I have a potty mouth. But that is what I said yesterday when I was driving home from work. I looked up into the sky, and saw a part of a rainbow. I drove into some development to try and take a picture, but it was quickly covered up with clouds. I just thought it was a nice thing to see on Niff’s 6 Month Angelversary.

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The Sixteenth & The Seventeenth

The two worst days of the month, the sixteenth and the seventeenth…

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